Anything But Ordinary

In “Snow” Adam told Charlie that in an alternate universe Taz would be his wife. Wanna take a look at that universe?

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Chapter Four: Suddenly Monday

Charlie’s POV
Why is it that Linda’s always around when I want to hang out just with the Ducks, but the moment I want to see her on her own she vanishes?

I haven’t been able to get this big stupid grin off my face since meeting Taz, it was one insane moment after another. I’ve never met someone so genuinely perky, she makes the cheerleaders look unenthusiastic. Then again, her happiness isn’t plastic like theirs.

And yes, I can give her as many mental compliments as I like because as soon as I find Linda we’re finished.


Dear gods! Here she is! She’s fiddling with her locker, and wow, does she look pissed off.

“Hey Linda.” I say pleasantly. “Can we talk?”

She glares in response.

“Are you ok?” I ask, with little enthusiasm.

“No I am not ok.” She tells me in a very stern tone. “Did you hear what happened to the memorial fountain in the mall on Saturday?” She sighs. “Of course you did, you were there.”

Oh. Right. Did one of her friends see me holding hands with Taz? That’s strange, I thought they were too busy saving the rain forest or something to go shopping. I really must stop thinking nasty thoughts about her.

“Uh-huh.” I say noncommittally.

“Well, why didn’t you offer to help clean it?” She demands with terrifying ferocity. “That fountain was in memorial of Sir Richard Wilkins III, he did many wonderful things for the conservations laws in this state!”

I guess now would not be a good time to tell her I was the cause of the purple foam. “Um, because I was with some friends.” I offer cautiously.

She sighs and rolls her eyes. “Always too busy to help!”

My mother doesn’t give me as much grief as her—and usually when Mom’s yelling she’s making a fair point. “Linda, we need to talk.” I say, I refuse to get distracted. I’m seeing Taz tomorrow, but only if I don’t have a girlfriend.

“Well, we can talk tomorrow. My friends and I are going to volunteer for the restoration project.” She snaps.

“Linda! Calm down! It’s just a bit of detergent. It’s not like someone threw acid in there!”

“I bet you thought it was funny!” She says accusingly.

I nod. “I did. Sue me. And we need to talk now.”

“I’m busy.” She slams her locker to punctuate the point.

I grab her arm to stop her walking away. “Well, Linda, I’m breaking up with you. When you’re finally unbusy enough to process that you can come talk to me… or better yet, don’t.”

Maybe that was a little nasty.

She stops what she’s doing. “You’re breaking up with me? Why?”

“Because we don’t have anything in common any more.” I say in the most gentle tone I can muster. “We don’t agree on anything, and it’s been months since we’ve had a conversation.”

“Months? What do you call this?”

“I call it an argument.” I say. “I’m sorry, Linda, but we just don’t make sense together.”

“Fine! My friends always told me I was too good for you anyway!” She shoulders her bag and marches off. I pity anyone who crosses her today.

As break ups go, that wasn’t so bad.

I have to grin.

It looks like I’m seeing Taz tomorrow.


  • The Girl, Official stalker of Carla, Tangible Muse and Bod Who Generally Fixes the Mean Nasty Coding That Makes Carla Cry (After Having Broken It In The First Place)